Judge Away

As a wife, sister, daughter, director, student, CNA, decorator, cleaner I OFTEN feel inadequate. I think it's a woman thing. And might I just say how thankful I am for Casey. He tells me it's ridiculous. He reminds me to stop comparing myself to others. He reminds me it doesn't matter. And I'm so grateful that I'm finally catching on!

So, I'm going to be real-

○ I love visitors. It terrifies me when people don't call first. I definitely don't wear a bra after work and I think our house is a pig sty.
○love our dogs. Hate their hair. It's impossible to keep clean. Or at least for me. I judge myself when people come over.
○I sucked in college. I'll be real. Going back makes me sick to my stomach, because I am afraid of failure.
○Casey is crazy smart and we are talking about Masters programs. Intimidating.
○Casey makes more money then I do. By a lot. I once got called a gold digger. While I'm not, it still affects me at least weekly.
○I never finish my craft projects. The last one sat inside the front door for two weeks.
○I need to loose some weight. I just love food and coke so much. I feel like a blob when I see pictures of me.
○I am addicted to coke. (The liquid beverage, obvi)
○I had a few really bad years. I am so thankful I am no longer miserable. But man I wish I could get those years back.
○I only snowboard the bunny hills. I'm a slow learner.
○I wish I was better at my job.
○I miss being a CNA and want to keep my certificate current, but again I worry I don't have enough time to be good at it.
○I didn't do my visiting teaching from May to August.
○Teaching Primary is hard. Really hard.
○I don't go to the temple enough.
○I've made cookies for the neighbors once. It's about the same number of times I've made them in my life.

Okay, I've had enough. I feel so free. I only write this because it needed to come out. No one is perfect! I can't look at others lives and compare their accomplishments to where I feel mine are lacking. I work full time. My house probably isn't as clean as someone elses. My job is hard, we probably do eat out more than most families.  I'm freakin tired when I get home. But I'll get there. I'll get good at this wife stuff.

Then we'll have a baby. And life as we know it will change again.

Happy Wednesday.

Work It

I'll be super honest. Aside from taking dance, in which I exerted as little energy as possible, I have never worked out. There would be a day here and there. I've bought items from every infomercial, but they look much better before being utilized.

One of my co workers wanted to start a workout program each day before work.

Doing P90X.

I'm not going to pretend I'm any kind of Richard Simmons. I am insanely proud of myself for getting to work by 7:30 each morning and attempting each exercise!

So week 1 is done. Obviously, my Friday workout clothing is a bit more opinionated thanks to Nike. But I was there! My legs will tell you all about it!

One day, I'm going to rock a hawt bikini bod!

You Ran Into What?

Prefix: Currently, I live with my parents.

Justification: I got a new job last month and Case and I aren't getting married til January giving me a 4 month gap.

Just so it's clear: Love it. Love them and I'm so grateful I get a bedroom. And food. And my family's funny.

Anyways.

They live a bit west of civilization. We have a pet goat. Neighbors have chickens. That kind of place.

So, you never know what you are going to see when driving home.

Historically, I'm usually the last one home. Once I almost ran into a black cow! It was in the road. I'm not that bad of a driver. It was in my space, not me in hers. Just clarifying. We then had to go rope it and put it away. That however was at least a year ago, so I had long forgotten to LOOK OUT.

I've been reminded.

In the past two weeks, I've almost hit 2 (underline, bold!!!) skunks! 2! The first one was running across the road and I had to slam on my brakes. It was at the earliest 11:30 at night so way to go fast reflexes on that stop. And, I'm soo lucky it didn't spray.

Then, not even 3 days later, skunk again. This time at least he was walking on the side of the road. I still had to slow way down so I didn't spook the fella.

So that brings us almost to the point of the story. Me driving home late the other night. Seriously, thought I was off my rocker. I may have been driving fast. I was so far beyond tired. I needed to get home. It was pitch black. Not kidding, here come 3 HORSES down the middle of the road right in front of my car. RUNNING! I was so scared I'd lost my mind.

Ran home, got my day and some rope. Yes, they were our horses running down the road. By the way there were 4 not 3, no idea how I didn't hit the 4th one.

Naughty horses that can unlock the gate got put it in a different pen for the night.

And it's now normal for ANYTHING to be coming down the road.